Sometimes our pain sets us to wandering– looking around for direction, relief, a place to tend to our wounds. Our bodies are looking to fight, freeze, or flee and deep instinct takes over when we’re standing at the edge of the great chasm that is the breaking point. We run from fear, from grief, from pain, from things that are just too much.
Pain leads us to look for Peace and Protection and our own little corner of grace and relief.
And, sometimes God, you provide a sign.
And set a hundred trees ablaze to light the way.
Because there is only One Way and it’s the way home. It’s the way of the lonely, the lost souls, the broken-hearted carrying around the heavy weight of unshed tears. It’s following in the footsteps of the One who carried a broken heart heavy with the weight of the world.
And you always come in close, God, and whisper “Come closer.” The wind carries our names breathed out in your voice. “Come sit with me.” And before we know it, we remember that we’re really running back home. Not running from, but running towards.
Running hard towards the always open door. We know that there’s nothing you want for the brokenhearted more than to teach them how to be received. You receive our weary souls with the aching beauty of always tender, always abundant, always warm love. Love that leads us right back to your always steady heart and open arms.
You fill the holes left by those who, in their own brokenness, forgot to remember not to break our hearts. You fill us right up to the brim because abundance isn’t the absence of pain or loss- abundance is learning how to receive what’s given and learning how to be received by the Giver of all good things.
Sometimes our pain sets us to wandering back into the arms of the only One who can heal. And we get to fall a little more in love with the One who rescues our souls.